Valentine's Day

Valentine's day is tomorrow so I thought I'd do some searching, below is how I (and i think my friends) see me and what I think I need in a relationship.

The Core Motivation that guides me through life is "Peace." This is not referring to a political agenda or the absence of war. It is, however, an absence of inner conflict, much closer to the idea of serenity, and an acceptance of oneself and others. I have a strong and compelling need to keep things in balance in my life so as to maintain an internal feeling of tranquility and comfort. I resist confrontation at all costs. (To me, feeling good internally is even more important than being good.) I am quiet by nature, I process things very deeply and objectively with great clarity. I am the best listeners. I respect people who are direct but recoil from perceived hostility or verbal battle. I need my "alone time" and refuse to be controlled by others. I want to do things my own way and in my own time. I ask little of others and resent others for demanding so much of me. I am probably much stronger than people think, but am not often seen for my strength because I don't easily reveal my feelings. I am receptive to people's input, I see things very clearly and objectively, I am very adaptable, I shine when in my element, and I am calm under pressure. I have the tendency to accommodate what others want instead of having to tell them "no". Consequently, I tend to get overloaded with what other people expect of me and soon I become overwhelmed or end up doing things that I don't enjoy. What happens is that I allow others to take control of the direction of my life instead of driving towards the life that I desire. I do NOT enjoy conflict in the least. It is the opposite of what I crave through my Core Motive of Peace. Rather than get into an argument with someone, for example, I would rather pretend that everything's okay, or I would rather lie in a conversation rather than tell him what I really think and risk the potential resulting conflict. So I don't say anything, until it bugs me so much that a month later it comes out. Let's be clear... dishonesty is not attractive especially when a severe case of "lack-of-backbone-itis," lies at the heart of it, so don't go there. I need to feel good inside, feeling good and comfortable on the inside is more important to me than being good or doing the right thing. So I need someone 1)who doesn't create unnecessary conflict or confrontation, and 2) they need to be able to help me become more comfortable confronting the necessary issues and not allow me an escape route through dishonesty. I need to be allowed my own space. I enjoy being with people, but I don’t need constant social interaction by any stretch of the imagination. I like my alone time, it allows me to process thoughts and to daydream. I need someone who is able to allow me to have my release time. I want to withhold my insecurities. I feel insecure about my various inadequacies, and feel embarrassed and confused about what to do when such things are exposed. Therefore, I tend to guard those feelings of insecurity and inadequacy very tightly even from my significant other. This is not always appropriate nor does it facilitate growth, so I need to find someone with whom I am able to open my heart and be vulnerable to. I want kindness from that special someone. I can be the nicest, kindest person in the world. I don't like conflict, and usually see it as being unnecessary when it manifests itself. I don't like mean people and what they stand for. Therefore, I need a partner who is kind to me and doesn't create turmoil and unneeded stress in my life.